As-salam and Hello!
This is my 1st entry. Been playing many broken records in my head - ideas, stories, reflection - and my 'folders' are bursting by the seams, so I am in dire need of finding a spot to store my thoughts; in hopes to further incubate them, shape them and toss them about so that readers can ponder and respond to them. I wish to grow, here.
What a title to kick off and send the ball rolling! ANGER. I have been interacting with myself about anger, convinced that I have finally arrived at the age of which enables me to LAUGH at the face of anger, instead of allowing it to swallow me. I am in the process of smashing to smithereens the devil's cauldron. I have a feeling, it won't take me over-night.
I am married, have two beautiful children and work 8-5 - in other words, that spells out 'I am an angry working mum/wife'. I hate who I have become. It has to stop. There is a stop to this and it can only happen if I really want it to. Therefore, I must persevere with this intent, remain with this NIAT.
Hence, this blog is entitled "Remain In Saff". To place my foot firmly, where it is meant to be, in line with my convictions. 'Dalam SAFF', as how us Malays would describe it - when we stand beside one another when we pray - In ('dalam') Saff. In line. In track. In proportion. In devotion. In ONE-NESS. In happiness. In addition to that, in Malay, there is a word 'insaf' which means 'realization'; conceptually meaning "a state of when an entity affects us positively", "enlightment". And having philosophized all these fragments, I am moved to externalize the essence. I wish to REMAIN IN SAFF..... Amin.... And this blog, is an avenue to enable knowledge sharing; a cable for those who are more knowledgeable to harness me into a constructive current, insyALLAH.
Anger, I WILL conquer you. Today, I giggled at you. I was at a surau, in a nearby mall. Went all the way to buy my favourite ice-cream : mint n chocolate, yumms!! As I finished my du-ah (need to work on a longer, more heart-jabbing one), an elderly passed by me and started arranging 3 prayer mats in front of me. My thoughts said, "What a nice lady, preparing the mats for her friends/children. This is an example of an 'investment'....". Then I turned around, and to my dismay, appalled at the sight of the disarrayed mats of where the lady pulled out the mats (that she arranged earlier on) from. MasyALLAH....(anger seeps in....cue, anger!). Short-lived was my realization ('keinsafan'). I was disheartened, with the lady, then much later realized - I was upset with myself; for not being able to be more forgiving. More readily forgiving. More understanding. Anger. U ALMOST consumed me in whole! I then sat down, folded the mats, arranged them nicely - as an act of redemption. It's ok. The lady may have legit reasons why.
Salam cer:) very happy and proud to be the first one commenting on ur first entry:) hope there'll be more to come..
ReplyDeleteA good topic to start on as well..ANGER..its a human attribute, most of us try to erase it, but I think its impossible. What I think is worth striving for is trying to suppress it as hard and as often as we can..the prophet in one of his sahih hadith Hadits ke-16
Jangan Marah
عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُ أَنَّ رَجُلاً قَالَ لِلنَّبيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم : أَوصِنِيْ، قَال : (لاَ تَغْضَبْ) فَرَدَّدَ مِراراً، قَال: (لاَ تَغْضَبْ) رواه البُخارِيُّ
Dari Abu Hurairah radhiyallahu anhu, Ada seorang laki-laki datang kepada Nabi shallallahu alaihi wa sallam, dan berkata, Berilah aku nasihat. Beliau bersabda, Jangan marah. Orang itu pun mengulangi permintaannya beberapa kali, namun beliau (tetap) bersabda, Jangan marah! (HR. Al-Bukhari)
The fact that the Prophet repeat it 3 times give us the indication that it's very important and very crucial to suppress our anger. Another good example wud be in our dua, the prophet use to repeat it 3 times and advice us to do the same if we are keen in getting what we ask for..
DeleteAnger opens the door of syaitan and our own hawa in going astray from following the footsteps of the prophet who are very patient to everyone and at any time.. Wallahua'lam
May Allah grant us mercy and patience in dealing with our worldly affairs and make us able to follow the sunnah of His beloved prophet Muhammad SAW...ameen..
Thanx for the valuable input wahai Shazif....it has taken my writing a notch higher :)
DeleteI find repeating my words help me connect to my intent. It sharpens my senses. Manusia ni, senang lalai - cakap sekali, kadangkala tak masuk. Eventually, bila ulang more than once (self-interaction) we build a sense of self-worth. Because we chose to LISTEN TO OURSELVES - diri kita yg sentiasa perlukan validation.